My INTJ – INFP Blog
Are you about to enter into a relationship with an INTJ personality type? INFP – These are sensitive souls but might be a little too idealistic for. I am a female INTJ in my late teens. Several years ago, I got into a relationship with a male INFP who is slightly older than myself. He had. An in-depth analysis of INTJ relationships and INTJs' compatibility with other personality types. For one, INTJs with a history of relational difficulties can be prone to attribute those . I'm an INTJ female and I'm married to and INFP male.
While INFJs are strong in extraverting their judgments, INTJs can be even more so because they lack the peacemaking, people-pleasing, and socially sensitive elements of Fe. INTJs may also be labeled as excessively stubborn or rigid, although this too relates to Te-related misunderstandings.
In order to compensate for such misunderstandings, INTJs might reason that if they could only understand people better they could overcome their relational difficulties. This may inspire them to gather as many facts and self-help strategies as they can regarding human psychology and relationships. While there is certainly nothing wrong with doing so, it may not always remedy their predicament in the way they might expect. For one, INTJs with a history of relational difficulties can be prone to attribute those failures to psychological problems in their partners, thereby failing to see their own shortcomings.
While not necessarily their fault, this should comprise at least as much of their relational attention as trying to see and diagnose problems in their partners.
- INTJ Relationships, Love, & Compatibility
To be fair, accurate self-evaluation can be a problem for all J-types, since their preferred mode of Judging Fe or Te is directed outwardly rather than inwardly.
This is one reason why typology can be so useful for INTJs, as well as other types.INFP Corner: On Dating INTJ vs ENTJ Men
One of the hallmarks of Fi is a desire to preserve and defend the uniqueness of the individual. Related to a strong concern for the individual is the Fi desire to aid the weak, helpless, and marginalized of society.
This is why IFPs, for instance, can often be found helping the homeless, working with children with special needs, protecting endangered species, etc.
[INFP] Yet Another INFP male/INTJ female Thread: Dump Her?
Once we add Fi into the mix, it is not hard to see how INTJs might be attracted, even if unconsciously, to rescuing and fixing those who seem needy or helpless. The relationship then becomes a sort of psychotherapeutic forum, with the INTJ working to analyze, diagnose, and treat his wounded partner. It zeroes in on the unique features of the individual and grows deeply attached to those qualities.
While INTJs may not experience the consistent strength of feeling that FP types do, they are nonetheless influenced by the less conscious workings of Fi, which helps inspire loyalty, love, and commitment. This makes it a highly alluring function, powerful enough to inspire a fierce and protracted tug-of-war with the dominant function. Money also relates to status, another Se-related desire. They may, for instance, feel forced to perform unfulfilling work that fails to utilize their Ni-Te gifts.
Or, they may struggle when the quality of a product or accuracy of information is compromised for the sake of marketability.
INTJs also hate having to act before their intuition has prompted them to do so.
INTJ Relationships, Love, & Compatibility
All of this can make the work life of INTJs rather miserable as they struggle to find a compromise between their Ni and Se concerns. Even the idea of compromise can be loathsome to INTJs, since their idealism and perfectionism are so pronounced. At any rate, I tried to explain unsuccessfully that I don't get my Love Tank filled as adequately as she does. Due to some valid medical reasons she hasn't been able to convey my 1 Language.
Due to her personality, it is also apparent that any effort to give me 1 must go through: Have you ever been interrupted by your partner focusing on the fact that "She's hungry" in the middle of a make-out session? Oh and that QT positioning where it seems we can have mutual ground? I'm polite and try to understand her fondness for these things, but this is almost NEVER reciprocated for things I'm personally interested in.
I will never forget the day I was so embarrassed she insulted a song I made with my brother when we were hosting a party for our friends. YES, she should have known damn well it was made by her fiance!! Doesn't hang with 'couple friends' that I believe encourage marital unit health with exposure.
Still hangs with her small circle of friends. I can understand having separate groups of allies, but I really should be pointing out what gets me the most about this: I usually end up venturing out alone for social calls.
How the heck is a wedding supposed to take place if you don't engage our supporters, who will be engaging us socially? She can be heard saying 'I don't anyone to watch me like a hawk'. Has a negative attitude toward any kind of communal living situation, like roommates.
Has plans to "hermit-tize" herself live 'alone' while adding the delusion I'm somehow gonna drop my social life to be her hermit-partner and has made claims to refuse to help my siblings 1 bro, 1 sis by babysitting her would-be nieces and nephews has looked after them in the past, and gladlyas well refusing to visit my family.
Ni-doorslammed her parents after I gave her the engagement ring, occasionally talks to her own siblings 2 bros, 1 sisno visitation.
INTJ INFP Relationships?
My NF processing says: She wants to marry in City Hall. I suspect, so she can 'doorslam' anyone she pleases out of any part of the process.
I oppose the self-centered nature of her utilizing it, because it ends up in: She has food allergies so I understand her limited palate, but she admits she can't cook, and doesn't grrrrrr -- defeatism! Doesn't cook with me to maybe learn, and doesn't pay into the groceries to support the fact that someone--me, cares enough to least cook for her.
In the beginning of the relationship, she used to do her share of cooking. Used to eat it happily knowing that she tried to show love by attempting something for me she wasn't great. Should you be divorcing over money?
After she's done blowing hers whether squandered or extra expense-basedI am the one who she expects to start spending on our necessities and her silly snack fixes. I want it, I get it. Can't get it, too bad for me. Gets in the financial hole, I naively offered to fix her finances which resulted in more squandering. It annoys me sometimes to have to be asked so many questions about things I thought she would either already understand, or would have the resourcefulness to at least research for herself.